MaveriK Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue. While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said "I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?" "Good question", noted the Rabbi. "We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles" "Oh", replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way, "What about all these biscuit purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?" "Ah, yes", replied the Rabbi, realising that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. "We collect them and send them back to the manufacturers, and every now and then they send a free box of holy biscuits." "I see!" replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi", he went on, "What do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?" "Here, too, we do not waste", answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins and send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete dick." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyT Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Very funny mate, but acertain type of police on this forum will be after you... Brace yerself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TonyP Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Very funny but didn't anyone tell you your not allowed to mention religion on this forum? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 http://img521.imageshack.us/img521/9599/repost5bl4.jpg http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=37273&highlight=rabbi http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=109306&highlight=rabbi http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=33293&highlight=rabbi H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyT Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 [qimg]http://img521.imageshack.us/img521/9599/repost5bl4.jpg[/qimg] http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=37273&highlight=rabbi http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=109306&highlight=rabbi http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=33293&highlight=rabbi H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaveriK Posted May 15, 2007 Author Share Posted May 15, 2007 I'll get me coat! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaveriK Posted May 15, 2007 Author Share Posted May 15, 2007 Original By onyP Very funny but didn't anyone tell you your not allowed to mention religion on this forum? Sorry my T is obviously playing up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neil tt Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Your right about the taxman though:d Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 I know AndyT was joking, but the butt of the joke is the taxman, it's not anti-semitic in any way. I was trying to think of ways to make the joke work with other religions, but it's difficult. Maybe Scientology ... "well we collect up all the candle drippings and we've also spent the last few hours reearching your career record at the tax office, and we notice that you falsified some mileage claims three years ago, get out of our church you charlatan!!! Quick, lets set-up a website discrediting the whole IRS." Something like that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobSheffield Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 I know AndyT was joking, but the butt of the joke is the taxman, it's not anti-semitic in any way. I was trying to think of ways to make the joke work with other religions, but it's difficult. Maybe Scientology ... "well we collect up all the candle drippings and we've also spent the last few hours reearching your career record at the tax office, and we notice that you falsified some mileage claims three years ago, get out of our church you charlatan!!! Quick, lets set-up a website discrediting the whole IRS." Something like that? Doesnt really have the same ring to it, funny nonetheless Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyT Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 I was just trying to warn Maverik about the Repost police is all.. Knew H would be along.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustGav Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Very funny mate, but acertain type of police on this forum will be after you... Brace yerself. Very funny but didn't anyone tell you your not allowed to mention religion on this forum? Oh, you can't be serious, are there people here that will take offence to that joke?? If that is the case then it is PC gone VERY VERY wrong... How is it offensive?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 How about... "Well, we base our whole faith on a load of SF bollocks and we get people to pay us money to gain higher circles of knowledge and respect in our community, then for $100K we tell people about aliens in a volcano" "Great, what do you call yourselves?" "The Aristocrats" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkTheBoy Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 I hate the tax man! Wicked joke mate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz Walker Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Its old, but funny. Might use that one if they send us an auditor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Oh, you can't be serious, are there people here that will take offence to that joke?? If that is the case then it is PC gone VERY VERY wrong... How is it offensive?? I don't think that was the case! I think AndyT meant the repost police of which I am proud to serve as a member..... H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustGav Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 I don't think that was the case! I think AndyT meant the repost police of which I am proud to serve as a member..... H. Ah apologies the, I was going to get on my non-pc soapbox, I'm fed up of PC stuff these days, get told off for saying someone is wearing a nice dress these days... (Not on the board, but in life in general now it seems) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyT Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Ah apologies the, I was going to get on my non-pc soapbox, I'm fed up of PC stuff these days, get told off for saying someone is wearing a nice dress these days... (Not on the board, but in life in general now it seems) I'm about as unPC as you can get without having to go to nick bud.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turbonut Posted May 15, 2007 Share Posted May 15, 2007 Thats mint Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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