R3DG3CKO ROB Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 really fu*ked off at the moment and could just do with a bit of a rant, so sorry in advance. Went out last weekend with some friends and on the way home organized a games night round mine for the following Friday (Yesterday) We'd agreed to meet in the pub for a couple of happy hour drinks and then back to the flat for a cheap night in. Basically, they didn't show up. I was there with my gf and a couple of other friends and got near to the end of happy hour so my lodger decided to ring them. He got through to one of them and asked if they were coming... He asked where we were and said they were on their way but never showed up... we got a text later saying they'd all gone to the cinema??? At this point I'm thinking 'what a total co*k' Later that evening (after the film finished) my lodger gets a phone call from my 'friend' saying that none of them knew anything about it! and shall he pop round as he now had nothing to do for the rest of the evening... lol I got a phone call from him to explain what had happed and why no-one let me know they weren't coming, saying that none of them knew anything about it and they didn't have any money for the pub anyway... The really irritating thing is that I saw two of the people supposed to be coming round on Thursday afternoon and asked them if they still wanted to come over? They said yes??? To rub further salt in the wound, I asked why we didn't even get an invite to the cinema and he basically couldn't give me an answer... We always make an effort to invite everyone to the cinema with us and I just don't get it... This isn't the first time this has happened either, they ditched us on New Years too I'm really not that bad a person but it's making me feel like sh*t... I'm fairly thick skinned but it feels like being back at school... ...{and breath} Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ivan Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Ditch 'em. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Ads Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 How long have you known them for? Could they be trying to "get rid" of you? Do you fall out with them at all? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kranz Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Hire a hit man Only kidding Friends like this are no friends at all. Be done with them & find some trustworthy mates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R3DG3CKO ROB Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 Sorry for the slow reply, I'm cr*p at typing - It's really quite awkward... I had a huge bust up with my best friend in our early teens. He was becoming a real spoilt tw*t and decided to try and manipulate the people around him. No real bullying but lots of mind games and turning people against each other... I decided to walk away from the group as nothing was getting any better...I got on with my life, went to college and made new friends (very hard when your 14 yrs old) It all made me a much better person in the end. 10yrs later I got a job working with a guy I knew from school (not really in our group) who had become really good friends with my old group during A - levels and Uni etc... So I met up with a few old faces... Bearing in mind that I'd been friends with some of these people from the age of four, it was a bit weird... My ex best friend is still a total twonk but seemed to have grown up a bit and even invited me to his wedding (which I thought was quite decent gesture) However this shit has now started and it's all a bit crappy as I'm a really laid back guy and have never had any conflict with any of the others... Just want to get along really, I'm too old for grudges and all that sh*t... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Class One Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Time to move on then methinks. Life's too short and all that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mathew Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 i know where you are coming from. its easy enough to tell you to get new mates but thats quite hard in the real world. i met a few new people during my college years and 'my best mate' i made then turned out to be quite sly and manipulative. i wont go into detail about the stuff he done but it wasnt what a best mate would do. i put it down to envy with me being more succesfull with what i gained out of our courses. luckily iv got another group of friends,old school mates, who i now realise are the BEST mates. i divide my time between both groups as this way i dont see too much of the first group of mates yet still keep in with them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R3DG3CKO ROB Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 It really sucks as most of them are ok but they're all too spineless to be genuine... To be honest I suspect it's not even to do with me to but no-ones said anything so it just feels like being back at bloody school. I think the problem lies with another friend of mine who expressed her interest in one of my old school mates while he was having problems with his gf... They eventually sorted the problems out and are now engaged to be married. So my theory is that his fiancé doesn't like him hanging around with me and the girl who said she liked him... We're all close to 30 now and It just amazes me that people can still be manipulated by the will of one person. I'm really not bothered about being best mates but how are you supposed to keep civil with people who treat you like sh*t??? lol it's driving me crazy... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 There's nothing as queer as folk! Ditch um, live in a cave and become a hobbit like me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R3DG3CKO ROB Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 My lodger has become really good friends with the whole group, which also winds me up... He spoke to my 'friend' last night and they told him that they were coming out which was the message relayed back to me... My 'friend' told me on the phone call last night that he never said they were coming??? So basically calling my lodger a liar.. and yet he still goes out with them today??? He only moved down here from Loughborough just over a year ago and has adopted most of my friends, I guess he's afraid of being left out as it never seems to bug him... I've always been a big fan of 'treat people how you expect to be treated' but I just seem to have a big kick me sign on my arse when it comes to friends... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redtwinturbo Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 I had similar problems with my group of friends I used to hang out with the most. Occasionally they would back out on me and sometimes I would find I hadn't been invited to certain things. Looking back on it retrospectively they used to give me quite a lot of stick & rip the piss although I didn't really realise it at the time. Since then i've made a new group of real friends and have been a lot happier and just kept in touch with a couple of my (true) friends from my old group. I know how it feels and its a difficult decision to make but I know im a lot better off now. Hope that sorta helps mate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyW Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 This is another reason why i don't have 'friends'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 This is another reason why i don't have 'friends'. It might also be the reason people don't like you!! Just kidding!!! Rob! If your mates won't give you the attention and the respect you deserve then they aren't worth having. I have a load of people that I call mates but only one or two that I would class as true friends. Don't waste your time and effort on people that aren't worth it. That has got to be the question though? Are they?? H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Geneb Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 go round and cut em up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyW Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 It might also be the reason people don't like you!! Just kidding!!! That's the thing though, i really dont mind if people don't like me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 go round and cut em up That's your answer to everything Andy!! Then again it's mine too!! H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R3DG3CKO ROB Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 Thanks for the support guys... Over the years I've come to realize that true friends are few and far between... I have five really good friends who would prob crawl through broken glass with their flies unzipped to help me out... unfortunately they've mostly moved away got married etc.. Irritatingly mates do come in handy from time to time... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Henk Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Hey, I can hardly say I KNOW you but we spent ages chatting at the Ace Cafe in January and you struck me as really genuine friendly bloke. I was grateful because it was my first meet and knew nobody but you made me feel welcome, it was very much appreciated! I agree, if people treat you like shit, I would ditch them in a heartbeat! Life is too short for all the "Games"! We all luv ya buddy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R3DG3CKO ROB Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 Ah... thanks Henk big hugs right back at ya mate /vbb/images/smilies/bbcode_grin.gif I've always tried to be nice to everyone... If I learned one thing at school it was that life's too short to make enemies when most of your 'friends' will stab you in the back in the end... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chewie Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 The solution is very straight forward and simple. What you do is absolutely NOTHING. You don't bitch, you don't let it get to you. What you do is stay cool. It's only a big deal if you make it a big deal. You survived before you met him and you will survive without him. You stay in contact with the other guys. Eventually they will see him for the vindictive spoilt brat that you say he is. (Only have you word though.) and eventually he'll be the one left out. But if you go around slagging him off it'll only show you up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Those don't sound much like friends to me. As you get older you tend to lose the dregs and you're left with only the truly reliable and caring people. It's a kinda natural selection. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobbeh Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 What Pete said. Been there before myself, after a while if it keeps happening just let them go. Sounds like these couldnt give a monkeys about you or your plans and are selfish only thinking about themselves.. and lie about it. Ditch'em. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest CoolsBlue Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 i call them FRENEMIES!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 i call them FRENEMIES!!!! cool word that LMAO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edge Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 I moved from essex to somerset this time last year. Soon made me realise who my mates are and family members who could give a toss. Let me count them. ummmmm that be 1 then lol. Its changed me for the better. All i care about is the supe, dogs and missis and our little house. I am now living my hassle free dream life. Just waiting for it to go wrong. Take no prisoners. Give time to the ones who deserve it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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