Havard Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 Scruffy Billy Jokes (1 of 3) One day in class, the teacher announces that they are to have a word competition. The word the class must use in a sentence is "Certainly". Little Mary starts with her sentence. "Apples are certainly green!" Very good says the teacher, but they can also be red! Little Jonny says "Banana's are certainly yellow!" Very good says the teacher, but they can also be green or black.!! Scruffy Billy is desperate to have a go but the teacher says no as he'll be rude! Little Molly says "Miss, Tigers are certainly orange!" Very good says the teacher but they are also black.!! Scruffy Billy eventually blurts out "Miss, Miss, Do Farts Have Lumps In Them?? The teacher says No Billy!! Scruffy Billy replies "Then Miss, I have certainly shat in my pants!! H. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnK Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 677 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 finding some really old tunes on my PC while i wait. Some nice and funky ones and ones I really do not know why i bought them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest fordyce Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cable Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 boo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris and Alana Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 seen as the posts need to go up abit il ask this here instead of in the chat section but you dont need to answer. Anyway here goes Has anyone used the Miami GT front mount intercooler? Im thinking of changing my dodgy stocker but dont know whethet to replace it with a SMIC or a nice FMIC. Oh and is it a 2 row or a 3? I know I could use the 'search' but it might help with post numbers, well 1 extra so far Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 aah right, I don't watch TV let alone eastbenders. My mums called Stella... Yeah, I was talking about your mum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uk-rich Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 i bet the post pop up quicker when it gets past 1000 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlanM Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 I have a Trust one so no idea Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uk-rich Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 seen as the posts need to go up abit il ask this here instead of in the chat section but you dont need to answer. Anyway here goes Has anyone used the Miami GT front mount intercooler? Im thinking of changing my dodgy stocker but dont know whethet to replace it with a SMIC or a nice FMIC. Oh and is it a 2 row or a 3? I know I could use the 'search' but it might help with post numbers, well 1 extra so far not used one, but seen one, the quality looks good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 anyone got some good vids we can watch? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uk-rich Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 que edd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 Scruffy Billy Joke Round 2!! One day in class the teacher announces that today is farm yard noise day and to get extra stars the kids must demonstrate their knowledge of animals. Little Mary starts "Moo Miss" Well done little Mary was that a Cow? "Yes Miss". Little Annie goes "Baaa Baaa Miss!!" Well done says the teacher, was that a Sheep? "Yes Miss." Scruffy Billy is bouncing at the back of the class with his arm in the air, "MISS MISS". The teacher replies "No Billy, you'll say something rude!! "But I live near a farm Miss!!" Billy argues!! The teacher continues, Little Mickey goes "Oink Oink, Miss" Well done Little Mickey, were you a pig!! Eventually Scruffy Billy gets a go!! The teacher says, go on then Billy whats your farm yard noise then? Billy shouts at the top of his voice..... "HEY YOU!! GET OFF THAT FU*KING TRACTOR!!":d H. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr lover Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 pop Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlanM Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 The Man's Dictionary. 1. Fine This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they are right but can't stand to hear you argue any longer. It means that you should shut up. Incidentally, never use the word "fine" to describe how she looks. It will lead to one of the arguments mentioned above. 2. Five minutes These words actually mean half an hour. It is the equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the rubbish, so women feel that it's an even trade 3. Nothing The word "nothing" means something and you should be on your guard immediately on hearing it uttered. It is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" is signal for an argument that will last "five minutes" and end with the word "fine". 4. Go Ahead (Raised eyebrow) Said in conjunction with raised eyebrows, it actually means the opposite. The words "go ahead" are not permission to do something; on the contrary it's a dare! If you mistake it for permission, the result will be the woman will get upset over "nothing" and you'll have a "five-minute" discussion that will end with the word "fine." 5. Go Ahead (Normal eyebrow) Said in conjunction with normal eyebrows, it should not be confused with the granting of permission either. It means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". It is normally precedes by a few seconds a raised eyebrow and the words "go ahead", followed by "nothing" and "fine". She will speak to you again in about "five minutes" when she cools off. 6. Loud Sigh This is not actually a word, but it is an important form of communication between a man and woman. It is also very frequently misunderstood by men. A "loud sigh" means she thinks you are a complete idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "nothing"! 7. Soft Sigh Again, not a word, but a statement. "Soft sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. It means she is momentarily content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe in the hope that the moment will last a bit longer. 8. Oh This word - followed by any statement - heralds big trouble. For example, "Oh, I spoke to him about what you were up to last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, just run - do not walk. She will tell you that she is "fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least two days. 9. That's Okay This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding what the penalty will be for whatever you have done. "That's okay" is often used in conjunction with the word "fine" and a raised eyebrow "Go ahead". Don't be fooled, once she has had time to plan it out, you're in for some mighty big trouble. 10. Please Do This is not a statement, it is an offer. The woman is giving you the chance to come up with an excuse for what you have done. In other words, a chance to get yourself into even more trouble. If you handle this correctly, you shouldn't get a "That's okay." 11. Thanks The woman is thanking you. Don't faint and don't look for hidden meaning. Just say "you're welcome". 12. Thanks A Lot "Thanks a lot" is dramatically different from "thanks". A woman will say "thanks a lot" then she is really ticked off at you. It is usually followed by the "loud sigh". This signifies that you have hurt her in some way. Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "loud sigh," as she will only tell you "nothing". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cable Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 pop goes the weasel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al Massey Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 h, were you scruffy billy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uk-rich Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 button Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 h, were you scruffy billy? Sorry Allan, I have not got any LOL's so I'm going on strike until we get over 1000 posts!! H. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mawby Posted February 23, 2007 Author Share Posted February 23, 2007 Just to confirm... These are pre facelift plastic j-spec headlights refurbed as standard ie no painting or modding inside. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supradan Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uk-rich Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 see Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 Just to confirm... These are pre facelift plastic j-spec headlights refurbed as standard ie no painting or modding inside. sounds good to me. Give Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
merckx Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 These are pre facelift plastic j-spec headlights refurbed as standard ie no painting or modding inside. I suppose I could always sell them to a fellow member. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted February 23, 2007 Share Posted February 23, 2007 Oh well time to get disqualified then!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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