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What do I do!?!


edd_t

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My GF's mum has put a right spanner in the works, and I dont know what to do, could do with some of your thoughts...

 

Ok its my girlfriends, Holly, birthday on November 11th, ages away. But ealrlier this week I managed to get a table for 2 at '15' Jamie Olivers restaurant for the night of her birthday. Fantastic.

 

Am round Holly's last night and her mum ask me if on November 11th I would be coming with Holly to the big family get together. Apparently about 150 people from their family are getting together, travelling from Australia and Japan!

 

Damn, so I say, I've booked something for that night. And Holly comes and pretty much argues with her mum that she already said we wouldnt be coming when her mum asked her about a month ago (I didnt know about this)

 

So later last night, her mum asks me to come down stairs and have a private word, so she asks me what I've booked, tells me whats happening, and how much it means to her!

 

So now I'm stuck! I have the mum who wants me to cancel the booking at 15 and wants me to talk Holly round into coming to this family thing. And as most people know, you dont want to p' off ya GF's mum!

And I have Holly who really doesnt care about the family thing, and is now mega excited that I have booked something 5 months in advance for her birthday which means it must be really special! (and she has been going on about wanting to go to 15 for ages since it was on TV)

 

What do I do? :blink:

 

ps. sorry thats a bit too much to read this early in the morning!

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Can you change the booking to the day before?

everyones a winner, and your other half will know you did have it booked for the 11th but changed it? that should keep the mum happy as well?

 

hope that helps?!

 

good luck

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That's a really tough one.

 

Can you not see if you can change the meal booking to another day? (i know that's probably a stupid question cause it's always fully booked).

 

I know i'd prefer the meal/suprise like your girlfriend but if it means upsetting her family then it's a tad risky.

 

Especially if all the other family members are going to be there and then only one isn't, they'll be mulling it over all night - well my family would anyway.

 

Can you not say to her mum, do the family thing during the day so you can still go out in the evening?

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Can you change the booking to the day before?

 

 

not really, I'm already booked up with work to do some DR rubbish so would make it tricky, usually have to work late, that sort of thing.

 

Easy - you keep your girlfriend happy, not her mum. It's her birthday and if she wants to go somewhere with you (which you should be pleased about) then why upset her just so her mum gets her own way?

 

thats what im thinking, maybe i should just let Holly and her mum battle it out, and keep to one side. then atleast it wouldnt be me annoying her mum! sort of!

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Easy - you keep your girlfriend happy, not her mum. It's her birthday and if she wants to go somewhere with you (which you should be pleased about) then why upset her just so her mum gets her own way?

 

I think this depends on what kind of family they are. My family would be fairly easy going and flexible - ie they'd let me do my own thing, rearrange etc. But Mike's family is not like that. Basically if they arrange something then i'd be a fool to try and change plans/do something on the day they'd arranged.

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That's a really tough one.

 

Can you not see if you can change the meal booking to another day? (i know that's probably a stupid question cause it's always fully booked).

 

I know i'd prefer the meal/suprise like your girlfriend but if it means upsetting her family then it's a tad risky.

 

Especially if all the other family members are going to be there and then only one isn't, they'll be mulling it over all night - well my family would anyway.

 

Can you not say to her mum, do the family thing during the day so you can still go out in the evening?

 

i really dont want to upset the family, i really fell in the middle.

they have already made the plans for the family thing, booked some big function room for it and everything. it starts at 6pm, my booking is at 7pm. and its miles away from London so cant do both :(

 

I think this depends on what kind of family they are. My family would be fairly easy going and flexible - ie they'd let me do my own thing, rearrange etc. But Mike's family is not like that. Basically if they arrange something then i'd be a fool to try and change plans/do something on the day they'd arranged.

 

yeh my family are totally easy with stuff like that. Holly's dad doesnt mind either really, but its her mum thats going mad, because its all the family on her side.

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Best option is what you said i think. Leave it to Holly to discuss with her mum. She can say how much she wants to go out with you and then you're not fighting with her mum.

 

The other thing is, surely if the relations are all coming from miles around they aren't just coming for one night, she can see them at some other point during their visit?

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Edd, if it was me, I'd spoil the surprise and tell Holly where I'd booked, then it would be up to her to make the decision.

 

At the moment, mate, you're on a hiding to nothing. You're going to be wrong whatever you do in the end, but in reality I'd rather piss off the mother, than the GF that I had to live with :D

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edd thats a bloody easy one, i cannot belive i have to tell you, book 15 for hundred and fifty two people and every one is happy:p

 

haha why didnt I think of that, I'll just call Jamie up, close personal friend, and ask to have the restaurant for the night :D

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Edd, if it was me, I'd spoil the surprise and tell Holly where I'd booked, then it would be up to her to make the decision.

 

At the moment, mate, you're on a hiding to nothing. You're going to be wrong whatever you do in the end, but in reality I'd rather piss off the mother, than the GF that I had to live with :D

 

thats true, atleast I can hide from the mother at my own place, and never have to go round there again!

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ok maybe thats a bit lavish, how about inviting them all round and you could sit around that veilside spoiler and eat:d

 

its certainly big enough :D

haha when i told my dad I have bought a new spoiler, his words were "it better not be one of those stupid big ones that make you look like a bi-plane!"

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Best option is what you said i think. Leave it to Holly to discuss with her mum. She can say how much she wants to go out with you and then you're not fighting with her mum.

 

The other thing is, surely if the relations are all coming from miles around they aren't just coming for one night, she can see them at some other point during their visit?

 

 

i dont really think Holly is worried about meeting them, they are all people she has never heard of, and will probably never see ever again, so whats the point.

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No - don't tell her! Well, you can if you want but i would personally prefer the suprise.

 

Like you said, she knows it's special cause you've had to book.

 

Hmm dont spoile the suprise, dont tell her...

Hope you can sort it out mate...

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It's for Holly and her Mum to sort out....just do whatever Holly says, not her Mum.

 

I was told you could only book 1 week in advance for 15...think it says so on the website...no wonder I couldn't get in when I tried to book 1 week in advance!

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