Tom S Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat? Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough? Why does someone believe you when you say there are nine billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection? Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a gun at him? Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"? What is the speed of darkness? If you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it? If the temperature is zero outside today and its going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be? If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? If its true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here? Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer? If someone with a split personality threatens to commit suicide, is it a hostage situation? Can you cry underwater? What level of importance must a person have, before they are considered to be assassinated instead of just murdered? If money doesn't grow on trees, why do banks have branches? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on bigger suitcases? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up, like, every two hours? Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? Why do doctors, when they ask you to strip, leave the room or close the cubicle curtain while you change?...... They're still going to see you naked anyway Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittyclaws Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Very good points Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DamanC Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Why do we have to read reposts? Sorry fella, couldnt resist Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrisSZ Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 and why do you never see baby pigions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom S Posted May 4, 2006 Author Share Posted May 4, 2006 Why do we have to read reposts? Sorry fella, couldnt resist Dunno, why do I have to read your bull sh*** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittyclaws Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 You never see white dog sh#t anymore, I think it's one of two reasons, 1- change of diet. 2- that breed of dog that laid it has became extinct Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DamanC Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Bullshit is what im good at, have to be good at something Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Why do we have to read reposts? hehe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorin Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Why do 24-7 businesses have locks? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Prawn Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 How does the man that drives the snowplough get to work in the morning, if the roads are full of snow? Why was the NA invented? Why do red cars go pink? Why the f*** did I bother reading this thread? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scoboblio Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? Always makes me laugh when I hear this question.... we didn't evolve from the same apes that are swinging through the tyres at Colchester zoo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scoboblio Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 If the temperature is zero outside today and its going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be? Oooh I know this one.... it's halfway between 0 degrees C and absolute 0 (-273), which makes it -136.5 degrees C Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest supra01 Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 EXCELLENT POST ADs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Prawn Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 we didn't evolve from the same apes that are swinging through the tyres at Colchester zoo Some people did!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Some people did!!!! Well you didn't even make it out of the sea so you can't talk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest chiefvinso Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Well you didn't even make it out of the sea so you can't talk. LMAO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Prawn Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Well you didn't even make it out of the sea so you can't talk. At least I'm not a potato!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 At least I'm not a potato!!!!!! Are you comparing me to a root vegetable? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewen Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Did Adam and Eve have bellybuttons ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 Are you comparing me to a root vegetable? you've met? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gaz1 Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 and why do you never see baby pigions? wtf is a pigions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt H Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 LMOA - some funny stuff here! One question tho - I dont get the: "why does superman stop bullets with his chest but duck when you throw a gun at him"? Can you divulge? Where that come from? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kittyclaws Posted May 4, 2006 Share Posted May 4, 2006 wtf is a pigions? Not sure,, maybe a cross between an onion and a pigeon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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