VIL Posted December 23, 2005 Share Posted December 23, 2005 I wanted to send out some sort of holiday greeting, but it is so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my solicitor yesterday, and on his advice (and after £299 in solicitors fees) I wish to say the following: Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, nonaddictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make Britain great (not to imply that Britain is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "Britain" in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher... Disclaimer: No trees were harmed in the sending of this message, however, a significant number of electrons were inconvenienced. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elliot Posted December 23, 2005 Share Posted December 23, 2005 This would be funny, if it wasn't so true! Nice post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tbourner Posted December 23, 2005 Share Posted December 23, 2005 I especially like the disclaimer at the bottom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperSupra Posted December 23, 2005 Share Posted December 23, 2005 This would be funny, if it wasn't so true! Nice post Sod that, I think it's hilarious! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnA Posted December 23, 2005 Share Posted December 23, 2005 Quick mods lock it, before someone sues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VIL Posted December 23, 2005 Author Share Posted December 23, 2005 Hi All This was sent to me in an electronic christmas card earlier today and not ment to be offensive in any way. It was posted in good humour but if it is inappropriate, mods please lock this. Sorry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnA Posted December 23, 2005 Share Posted December 23, 2005 http://www.max-boost.co.uk/stuff/complainbutton.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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