Jump to content
The mkiv Supra Owners Club

Women vs men in the shower


Supraleeturbo

Recommended Posts

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN

 

Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according to lights and darks.

 

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

 

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc.

 

Get in the shower.

 

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

 

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

 

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

 

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

 

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.

 

Shave armpits and legs.

 

Turn off shower.

 

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

 

Spray mould spots with Tile cleaner.

 

Get out of shower.

 

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

 

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

 

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

 

 

 

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN

 

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

 

Walk naked to the bathroom.

 

If you see partner along the way, shake willy at her making the 'woo-woo'

sound.

 

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

 

Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum and tenderly stroke your belly.

 

Get in the shower.

 

Wash your face.

 

Wash your armpits.

 

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

 

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.

 

Wash your hair.

 

Make a Shampoo Mohican

 

Wee.

 

Rinse off and get out of shower.

 

Partially dry off, whilst seductively stroking your belly.

 

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time.

 

Admire willy size in mirror again.

 

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

 

If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

 

Throw wet towel on bed.

I KNOW YOU'RE LAUGHING BECAUSE IT'S TRUE!!!!!!

 

PASS THIS ON TO SOMEONE WHO NEEDS CHEERING UP, AS THIS WILL DO IT.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue. You might also be interested in our Guidelines, Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.