Jamesy Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 Right so i was in the pub last night with family and my kids. When i went to go to the loo there was 3 urinals. Straight away i had the hump as the bloke who was already in there decided it'd be a good idea for him to stand there, legs spread wide, hands on hips in the middle urinal - why do people do this when theres only 3? So i thought great i've now had to stand almost shoulder touching this smarta**e. This is when the drama happened.... I dont usually suffer from stagefright but noticed he hadnt started his 'session' yet. I really needed to go but for the life of me it werent happening. Same thing was happening apparently with my new close neighbour. We must have both stood there for the best part of 60seconds (long time) with nothing happening, just staring dead straight not daring to make a noise or move head. By this time im thinking i cant just leave, so im trying with all my might, and praise the lord eventually i managed start what id come to do. Strangley seconds later and it seemed he was ok too. By far one of the most awkward and awful moments ive ever experience in a blokes toilet . Next time i'll use the shy boys room with the door Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abz Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 Did you both then smile at each other with a sign of relief? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Attero Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 This is why I fail at urinals. This happens too often for me and it just looks weird when you walk out without starting what you came to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesy Posted September 18, 2011 Author Share Posted September 18, 2011 Did you both then smile at each other with a sign of relief? no mate. The shame of the whole situation i didnt look at him once. I couldnt bare spotting him back inside the pub. Still cant believe he took the middle urinal of 3. Everyone knows the rules eh?!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abz Posted September 18, 2011 Share Posted September 18, 2011 no mate. The shame of the whole situation i didnt look at him once. I couldnt bare spotting him back inside the pub. Still cant believe he took the middle urinal of 3. Everyone knows the rules eh?!! I only asked as I had this hilarious image of you both then looking at each other with a huge smile of relief to then realise 2 seconds later how gay that looked & then both look away like nothing happened! You should have told him he fails at toilet etiquette. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lbm Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Waterfall mental imagery be the answer Jamesy. Or perhaps the prospect of an encounter with a certain Mr G. Michael. Either way should encourage the undecided watery flow dear boy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Shycock syndrome, more common than you think. I can't even go if there is a wall mirror and I can see my own face. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lbm Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Shycock syndrome, more common than you think. I can't even go if there is a wall mirror and I can see my own face. Exactly - it goes back to Elizabethan times. Shakespeare wrote prolifically about this, and in particular, about Shycock and his pound of flesh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I looked once, the other guy said "Oi, stop 'king leering" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lbm Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I looked once, the other guy said "Oi, stop 'king leering" "To pee or not to pee?" "That...is the question" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sdistc Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Funnily enough, I picked you as a "sitting down to pee" kinda guy, Jamesy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesy Posted September 19, 2011 Author Share Posted September 19, 2011 Funnily enough, I picked you as a "sitting down to pee" kinda guy, Jamesy. im smiling but i dont know if thats a compliment or a p*** take!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesy Posted September 19, 2011 Author Share Posted September 19, 2011 I looked once, the other guy said "Oi, stop 'king leering" Ha - the funny thing is the longer the stalemate goes on for the more you have to concentrate to not move your head (the one on top of your shoulders) even a slight bit. I dont think ive tried to channel that much concentration to one body part for so long before!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jim Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Read something like that before, pee-post? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Right so i was in the pub last night with family and my kids. When i went to go to the loo there was 3 urinals. Straight away i had the hump as the bloke who was already in there decided it'd be a good idea for him to stand there, legs spread wide, hands on hips in the middle urinal - why do people do this when theres only 3? So i thought great i've now had to stand almost shoulder touching this smarta**e. This is when the drama happened.... I dont usually suffer from stagefright but noticed he hadnt started his 'session' yet. I really needed to go but for the life of me it werent happening. Same thing was happening apparently with my new close neighbour. We must have both stood there for the best part of 60seconds (long time) with nothing happening, just staring dead straight not daring to make a noise or move head. By this time im thinking i cant just leave, so im trying with all my might, and praise the lord eventually i managed start what id come to do. Strangley seconds later and it seemed he was ok too. By far one of the most awkward and awful moments ive ever experience in a blokes toilet . Next time i'll use the shy boys room with the door I am surprised that you didn't just look at each other and say "Lets just call it a draw, eh?".. Did you both wash your hands together too? This all sounds a bit gay to me. H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesy Posted September 19, 2011 Author Share Posted September 19, 2011 I am surprised that you didn't just look at each other and say "Lets just call it a draw, eh?".. Did you both wash your hands together too? This all sounds a bit gay to me. H. I couldnt look at him mate, i didnt want to recognise him again in the bar later!! I wanted to just walk away but after the best part of standing there i had to get it done - plus he was there first - surely the onus was on him to start it off!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbuddy Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Happeneded to me aswell at sum time in my life! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Happeneded to me aswell at sum time in my life! It's happened to me a number of times but I wouldn't tell anyone..!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 LMAO! This thread has made my day. A few weeks ago, whilst visiting my local harvester (yea i know,.. harvester is pretty snazzy but it was a special occasion, so thought i'd push the boat out) i had to pay a visit to the urinal. Just as I grabbed hold of my hose and unraveled it, a small boy entered the room and came up beside me, obviously oblivious to the unwritten one empty space beside every person rule that James referred to, he started to sprinkle. What upset me, apart from the personal space issue was the fact he was blatantly staring hard at Superstar Jr. Without shame or embarrassment he just watched me and my winky the whole time. Pretty much imminently the pressure dropped off from a steady healthy gush to a miniature drip and finally stopped, with a full blander left to run. Returning to my table i told the g/f i'd just been intimidated by a 6yr old and couldn't go so we must leave NOW as i wanted to finish off at home. Is it only a male problem or do females get stage fright too? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 LMAO! This thread has made my day. A few weeks ago, whilst visiting my local harvester (yea i know,.. harvester is pretty snazzy but it was a special occasion, so thought i'd push the boat out) i had to pay a visit to the urinal. Just as I grabbed hold of my hose and unraveled it, a small boy entered the room and came up beside me, obviously oblivious to the unwritten one empty space beside every person rule that James referred to, he stared to sprinkle. What upset me, apart from the personal space issue was the fact he was blatantly staring hard at Superstar Jr. Without shame or embarrassment he just watched me and my winky the whole time. Pretty much imminently the pressure dropped off from a steady healthy gush to a miniature drip and finally stopped, with a full blander left to run. Returning to my table i told the g/f i'd just been intimidated by a 6yr old and couldn't go so we must leave NOW as i wanted to finish off at home. Is it only a male problem or do females get stage fright too? This is freaky - I was just mentioning you in another thread and you appear! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 LMAO! This thread has made my day. A few weeks ago, whilst visiting my local harvester (yea i know,.. harvester is pretty snazzy but it was a special occasion, so thought i'd push the boat out) i had to pay a visit to the urinal. Just as I grabbed hold of my hose and unraveled it, a small boy entered the room and came up beside me, obviously oblivious to the unwritten one empty space beside every person rule that James referred to, he stared to sprinkle. What upset me, apart from the personal space issue was the fact he was blatantly staring hard at Superstar Jr. Without shame or embarrassment he just watched me and my winky the whole time. Pretty much imminently the pressure dropped off from a steady healthy gush to a miniature drip and finally stopped, with a full blander left to run. Returning to my table i told the g/f i'd just been intimidated by a 6yr old and couldn't go so we must leave NOW as i wanted to finish off at home. Is it only a male problem or do females get stage fright too? I am now thinking about Ed junior.!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 This is freaky - I was just mentioning you in another thread and you appear! was it 'who is the most handsome member' thread? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I am now thinking about Ed junior.!! LOL, I'm always thinking about Havard junior. AND Harvard senior .... sometimes Harvard senior with Havard junior together Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesy Posted September 19, 2011 Author Share Posted September 19, 2011 lmao! This thread has made my day. A few weeks ago, whilst visiting my local harvester (yea i know,.. Harvester is pretty snazzy but it was a special occasion, so thought i'd push the boat out) i had to pay a visit to the urinal. Just as i grabbed hold of my hose and unraveled it, a small boy entered the room and came up beside me, obviously oblivious to the unwritten one empty space beside every person rule that james referred to, he started to sprinkle. What upset me, apart from the personal space issue was the fact he was blatantly staring hard at superstar jr. Without shame or embarrassment he just watched me and my winky the whole time. Pretty much imminently the pressure dropped off from a steady healthy gush to a miniature drip and finally stopped, with a full blander left to run. :d Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 was it 'who is the most handsome member' thread? Of course! http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?254979-Who-are-all-the-guests&p=3213344&viewfull=1#post3213344 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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