Purity14 Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 Hi scott. Quick note the one that cheated isnt the one that the thread was about. Erm... Problem i have is i dont really do much.. so all i have most of the time is games and TV and thoughts to myself. I dont think of her all the time. Just if i saw a pic or heard about what shes up to i would get a bit on the crappy side! Ive heard Matt H is recruiting new friends IRL atm, drop him a PM. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 Hi scott. Quick note the one that cheated isnt the one that the thread was about. Erm... Problem i have is i dont really do much.. so all i have most of the time is games and TV and thoughts to myself. I dont think of her all the time. Just if i saw a pic or heard about what shes up to i would get a bit on the crappy side! Cheated on you? Sorry, I must have missed that part Nothing wrong with what you are doing with your time bud, my point is that it is because of the time with your thoughts that your brain is telling you it is feelings for her that is making you upset. In actual fact it is just the lack of "someone special" that is the genuine void in your life. It is a perfectly normal feeling to have when you have had someone to share your life with, who actually meant something to you, and then they are gone. My warning is not to confuse the lack of a person, with the lack of a particular person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Graham S Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 Ask yourself a very serious question. If you went out tonight, met a very nice girl who you got along famously with, had a really good time and procured her number with the ambition to go out for a drink or a meal at a later date......... would this other girl even be on your mind? When you are thinking about her, pining after her, are you sitting with a beer in your hand watching drivel on TV with nothing but your thoughts to occupy your mind? Are you looking at friends in their relationships and looking back to the relationship you once had? If so then none of this has anything to do with that particular girl. Ahhhhh, ain't you a love! But honestly, I think thats some VERY good points... How old are you Scott and Malc? I think most of us can say we have all been in that situation, maybe some of us still are and just don't wanna say anything . Alot of people have said, when you find the 'RIGHT ONE' you'll know and all of these feelings you are having will disappear. I do think there is someone out there for everyone and it just happens... I think you've been through alot of shit Malc, along with most of us probably, you either learn to put these feelings in the back of your head or you learn to deal with them and know what not to do next time. The right one will love you for who you are, the problems you may have and with a bit of luck not make you sell your fucking UK6 to get fucking married! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 30 bud I tend to have a crystal way of looking at relationships/feelings/psychology (it's how I am so good at getting under peoples skin ). I always have had. Sometimes I come across as cold with my partners due to looking at everything almost calculated but I'm usually right about how a party is feeling. It's obviously completely different on the internet but the experience I have behind me in the few relationships I have had mean that I can put myself in another persons shoes/situation and look from a logical perspective at how the person might be feeling. The time that I described with my Ex was exactly what I described above. We had some great times but had reached the end of our relationship, once we were apart though there was a void. After a month or 2 I was really pining after my ex even though it was me that ended it. My friend convinced me to leave it be, to protect her feelings more than mine, and I eventually came to realise that it wasn't her that I was missing.... it was the companionship. It isn't the first time I've been called an agony aunt on here lmfao. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Graham S Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 30 bud I tend to have a crystal way of looking at relationships/feelings/psychology (it's how I am so good at getting under peoples skin ). I always have had. Sometimes I come across as cold with my partners due to looking at everything almost calculated but I'm usually right about how a party is feeling. It's obviously completely different on the internet but the experience I have behind me in the few relationships I have had mean that I can put myself in another persons shoes/situation and look from a logical perspective at how the person might be feeling. The time that I described with my Ex was exactly what I described above. We had some great times but had reached the end of our relationship, once we were apart though there was a void. After a month or 2 I was really pining after my ex even though it was me that ended it. My friend convinced me to leave it be, to protect her feelings more than mine, and I eventually came to realise that it wasn't her that I was missing.... it was the companionship. It isn't the first time I've been called an agony aunt on here lmfao. Same age as me then... Definately think thats sound advice mate. I think the world would be a better place if everyone actually spend time to stop and think of what others would think before they acted on them. You sound like a top bloke and its nice to have people like you on here and to get to know (without sounding gay!!). Malc, glad you feel you can put you feelings so openly on here and get decent honest helpful advice, especially with the male/female ratio on here.. I do feel the cold, dark winter months don't help these matters at all. I think the weather can really play a part of how you feel inside and i'm sure on a wet dark evening you will be sat there feeling much lower. Have you tried concentrating on something you enjoy doing to try taking your mind off how you feel.... So, you an xbox or PS3 guy?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 Same age as me then... Definately think thats sound advice mate. I think the world would be a better place if everyone actually spend time to stop and think of what others would think before they acted on them. You sound like a top bloke and its nice to have people like you on here and to get to know (without sounding gay!!). Malc, glad you feel you can put you feelings so openly on here and get decent honest helpful advice, especially with the male/female ratio on here.. I do feel the cold, dark winter months don't help these matters at all. I think the weather can really play a part of how you feel inside and i'm sure on a wet dark evening you will be sat there feeling much lower. Have you tried concentrating on something you enjoy doing to try taking your mind off how you feel.... So, you an xbox or PS3 guy?? Thanks People tend not to see the sincere side of me, I keep it for special occasions Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 People tend not to see the sincere side of me *raises hand* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 *raises hand* Don't take it personally. I don't blame your judgement of me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Graham S Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 *raises hand* Ok... I'm seeing that as a bad thing! Put it down before someone gets hurt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted December 17, 2010 Share Posted December 17, 2010 Don't take it personally. Oh, I don't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a98pmalcolm Posted December 18, 2010 Author Share Posted December 18, 2010 cheers Scott, yer hes a top fella been in contact with him in a few threads.. Im 25 and im a PS3 and Pc gamer lol. I have to amit one of the perks of owning a Supra is this community. I know everyone (most lol) members are really sound and will take threads sensiable when it comes to serious stuff. I totaly agree with you scott. Its been pondering in my mind why this problem persists. I think there are 2 real big parts to it. 1. She was the last successful and happy relationship. Others after that failed make me look back at her and see hoe well we did. Especialy with the distance between us (pysical miles). & 2. Is my termanal illness. Not being able to go out to town on saturday nights and have a few drinks, go to gig or car show to meet someone.. If i start getting better and meet a nice las i think its sumin then i can look back at good times and if i ever bump into her somehow it will be a nice hello and ctach up like it is with my other ex's. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Posted December 18, 2010 Share Posted December 18, 2010 cheers Scott, yer hes a top fella been in contact with him in a few threads.. Im 25 and im a PS3 and Pc gamer lol. I have to amit one of the perks of owning a Supra is this community. I know everyone (most lol) members are really sound and will take threads sensiable when it comes to serious stuff. I totaly agree with you scott. Its been pondering in my mind why this problem persists. I think there are 2 real big parts to it. 1. She was the last successful and happy relationship. Others after that failed make me look back at her and see hoe well we did. Especialy with the distance between us (pysical miles). & 2. Is my termanal illness. Not being able to go out to town on saturday nights and have a few drinks, go to gig or car show to meet someone.. If i start getting better and meet a nice las i think its sumin then i can look back at good times and if i ever bump into her somehow it will be a nice hello and ctach up like it is with my other ex's. You're right on the money with your thoughts mate, IMO of course. Friends, family and positive thinking is the way forward. I really feel for you mate, shitty time of year for things to be piling up. I didn't realise you were seriously ill, clearly that is going to constrain your avenues with regards to finding new partners but that is definitely something to aim and look forward to. Don't mean to say turn that frown upside down but at the end of the day, as I have said before, when you are driving through hell..... just keep driving! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a98pmalcolm Posted December 18, 2010 Author Share Posted December 18, 2010 Cheers Scott. And for all other advice. Yer i will just keep trolling along like i have been doin for....well... the past forever years... Dont wanna soind like i after attention as i sure none of u think that way. But advice from people other than friends and family i feel is for the good coz there will then be more honest views... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOB B Posted December 18, 2010 Share Posted December 18, 2010 Hope things get better! http://dan.newz.ro/gallery/so-funny/kitten_hugs_teddy.gif Snakes with tits the lot of em! (there is the odd exception) That is very cute. The cat that is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Attero Posted December 18, 2010 Share Posted December 18, 2010 I've killed all my ex's. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GlennK Posted December 18, 2010 Share Posted December 18, 2010 My ex? Who? No way. Get over it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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