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wedding speech please help


Jurgen-Jm-Imports

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am best man for a wedding on 11th june, anybody done a speech as i am really lost in what to say any tips or any scripts would be great.

 

something to include the usaul how great his lass is, how adorable his 2 kids are.

 

am really stuck i think am going to freeze.

 

what should you say or do i just make it up, i would like few pointers.

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A good one is get a load of key blanks and distribute them amongst various female guests and maybe one male guest. During your speech make some reference to maybe a rented property he used to have and how the landlord had been on at you for the return of the keys. Then say along the lines of "if anyone has got any keys for the flat could they just pop up and replace them" and the ladies come up one at a time at first then loads and loads leaving the (game) bloke till last. Went down a treat at my bro's wedding I was best man at!

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Just keep it funny and leave out all the embarrassing stuff about the groom :taped:

 

Just joking, but as the groom in just 11 weeks time its just a hint to Ian R ( best man) I must be mad!!!!!!!!!, thats Ian having the best man duties,not the wedding (Maria may look at the post :run: )

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Jurgen, im best man at my mates wedding in July and ive still gotta write a speech yet. Ive already done it once a couple of years back and like Ro pointed out there is loads of stuff on the net you can use. I did find a couple of sites that had whole speeches on where you could just fill in the appropriate blanks and add your own stories to fill them out........ :)

 

There was loads of canny jokes on them to like...... The groom said that if i make a good job of this speech then i can be best man at his next wedding. I put that it mine and got a lugh from it, but I dont think the bride was best pleased :eyebrows:

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my best one was gettin £50 off my dad then accusing my bro during the speech of attempting to bribe me. got up, walked over to him and slammed it on the table sayin im givin it back and im not bein bribed. a min later after the embarrassment i pegged over and knicked it back....then my dad forgot, woohoo up £50! :D :friday:

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A good one is get a load of key blanks and distribute them amongst various female guests and maybe one male guest. During your speech make some reference to maybe a rented property he used to have and how the landlord had been on at you for the return of the keys. Then say along the lines of "if anyone has got any keys for the flat could they just pop up and replace them" and the ladies come up one at a time at first then loads and loads leaving the (game) bloke till last. Went down a treat at my bro's wedding I was best man at!

 

Classic, may have to try that one :D

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Just returned from my brother's wedding in Michigan. His twin was the best man and like you waited til the last minute. Hung over sweating bullets he was. I dictated the speach to him 30 minutes before showtime. Go with your gut and say something funny. Make sure it's tailored to the bride/groom and that the audience will understand. A few hits off the flask just before doesn't hurt either. Just don't get wasted or things tend to go badly.

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Did one a few years ago

Told some racey stories about the groom (like when he jumped out of the first floor window of an African brothel without his trousers or the group's food kitty money).

 

Went down well with the young 'uns but he was livid for over a year and if I did it again I'd miss out the 'adult bits' - keep it clean, tell a few jokes and be sincere and you'll be a hero afterwards.

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My mate did a speech a friend's wedding and read a fake letter from Joe, Elizabeth and the whole farkin family...

 

Needless to say in a room full of seventh aventists (I think that is what they were), it didn't go down particularly well, apart from the sniggers from my bunch.

 

Gav

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