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Little B'stards


TLicense

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u cant choose your family or neighbours, life sucks like that.

 

Moved in a few years ago and neighbours on both sides were ok, then they moved out and i have what can only be described as pikeys on one side and chavs on the other. The Chavs played fucking house music at all hours(with lots & lots of base bless 'em) until i did the threatening thing which worked a treat. But the pikeys, god damn them, when they moved in there was floor being laid at all hours, banging and crashing and they were too stupid to take my threats seriously. They moved out a few months back and now i have two girls sharing the house. This of course sounds sweet except they cant park cars for shit and i have had to bend my wing mirror back on many an occasion.

 

Moral - Win Lottery, buy big detached house, shoot pikeys/chavs on sight!:eyebrows:

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I'm going to call round tomorrow evening and have a few choice words with his Dad (he usually turns up on Friday and fecks off Sunday) who I think is a professional (well he's paid over £150K for a flat and drives a new MR-S around)

I think he probably just doesn't know what the boy is up to during the week, however the problem is if he just doesn't care, at which point things may turn a little bit nasty.

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I'm going to call round tomorrow evening and have a few choice words with his Dad (he usually turns up on Friday and fecks off Sunday) who I think is a professional (well he's paid over £150K for a flat and drives a new MR-S around)

I think he probably just doesn't know what the boy is up to during the week, however the problem is if he just doesn't care, at which point things may turn a little bit nasty.

 

Like you say, his Dad may not know what he's up to. Just be civil and polite and try not to be arsey, that may just put their back up even more imo.

 

Not much comfort but at least you never had my old neighbour! Nobody has had worse than him.

 

A retired (but fit and strong) OAP who went to church every week with his missus terrorised us. Too many incidents to list but the highlihgts were:

 

3 Fire engines being called out to investigate a smelly gas we had supposedly disturbed which was leeking into his property. Tipping petrol into our porch then asking my mom for a light. Spat at my Dad whilst he was pulling off drive, Dad chases to be turned on with kitchen knife. He filmed his own back garden because he was convinced me and my brother were poisening his lawn!

 

Also, he tried kicking our front door down only to be confronted by my Dad who wrestled him to the ground. The neighbour (dressed in just his trousers with no shoes and socks) kept repeating 'I'm not an insect, I don't live under ground!' Before the old bill carted him off :looney:

 

This I kid you not is all true! :D

 

We had a court injunction put out on him to stay away from us. Eventually we moved. We've heard through the grapevine he's since been sectioned!

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I'd spray him with pesticide anyway, you can never be too sure with these things.... :eyebrows:

 

:D :D Quality, it probably wouldn't have detered him!

 

He used to have a menacing picture of a Doberman in his window saying 'Beware of the guard dog' right next to his picture of Jesus saying 'Jesus loves You'

 

What a freak! :D

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MMM difficult one. the negative equity and lets be fair "why the f*ck should i move" thing is a bit of a sod. Its the actions of a minority of individuals that makes the majorities life a real PITA. Escalation is gonna be a biatch unless you are prepared to bury one of the Mo-Fo's under the patio (I've met you and you seem the type chap). The local authorities aren't gonna do jack sh*t either without a ream of evidence that you will have to spend your entire existence for months gathering. That leaves you really with only one option. Have a go at diplomacy. Start by having a pleasant word in passing with the chavs themselves, not a confrontational thing just a conversational piece. If that gets you no-where which I suspect it wont then have a non confrontational chat with the parents and see where the land lies there, possibly drop a few hints about anti social behaviour in the area. Then if you can build some goodwill with the parents you may be able to make inroads about the behaviour of the sprogs. Or you could just f*ck em off totally and live in hell for a while.

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MMM difficult one. the negative equity and lets be fair "why the f*ck should i move" thing is a bit of a sod. Its the actions of a minority of individuals that makes the majorities life a real PITA. Escalation is gonna be a biatch unless you are prepared to bury one of the Mo-Fo's under the patio (I've met you and you seem the type chap). The local authorities aren't gonna do jack sh*t either without a ream of evidence that you will have to spend your entire existence for months gathering. That leaves you really with only one option. Have a go at diplomacy. Start by having a pleasant word in passing with the chavs themselves, not a confrontational thing just a conversational piece. If that gets you no-where which I suspect it wont then have a non confrontational chat with the parents and see where the land lies there, possibly drop a few hints about anti social behaviour in the area. Then if you can build some goodwill with the parents you may be able to make inroads about the behaviour of the sprogs. Or you could just f*ck em off totally and live in hell for a while.

 

This is your best bet imho.

 

Failing that just turn your TV up loud so you can't hear them making all the noise! ;) :D

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with the current 'zero tolerance' in firearms, this may be a recipe for a visit from an armed response unit and a criminal record as a bonus.

 

I knew a doorman who was a big fella, big flash car and in with all the "boys".

 

He was showing his mate an air rifle out the back of his car one Friday evening round the side of the pub (which is very quiet) probably saying "yeah, get onto me with this!!", and somehow, someone saw him flashing it around.

 

They must have phoned the police as the armed response unit turned up guns pointed at him, screaming at him to get on the floor. The doorman was practically in tears - the police really took no prisoners here - though I guess I wouldve been too!!

 

Dont get a firearm out whatever you do!!!

 

If youre going to get someone "big" to sort it, then make sure either they do a bloody good job of scaring them. The only thing I worry about, is that in a few months time they make seek revenge and damage your property.

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