bigcol Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 Subject: Message from The Prime Minister Message for the People of the United Kingdom Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of the economy, your Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers 50 years of age and older on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early). Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the government to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the government deems appropriate. Only persons who have been RAPED can get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). Obviously, persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the government. Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on, will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The government has always prided itself in the amount of SHIT it gives out. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your local MP. They have been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle. Sincerely, Rt Hon. Gordon Brown Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al Massey Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=189555&highlight=Management+Notice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigcol Posted August 18, 2009 Author Share Posted August 18, 2009 I shall hang my head in shame:( I hadnt seen that before Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.