Missile Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 Not me Personally but... Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment. When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes." This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tannhauser Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 Why would you want to develop M&Ms that are tougher to eat? If your breeding stock is utilised, we would anticipate ithe progeny gradually developing an impenetrable candy shell. Nobody would want to eat this, so demand would fall and the hard-shelled variant would face intense selection pressure compared to its softer-shelled cousin. I think that you are equating 'fitness', as in 'survival of the fittest' to mean 'toughest', rather than 'best suited to its environment'. I'm afraid that your Promethean experiments are therefore doomed to failure. However, I thought this was a nice turn of phrase: I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndrewOW Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 This thread is prime fodder for he-who-shall-not-be-named, so be careful as it goes. I like M&Ms the way they are, thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ellis Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 I like you . . . . I shouldn't but I do! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lexsum Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 peanut or chocolate, which one is stronger? only one way to find out! FIGHT!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lbm Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 This thread is prime fodder for he-who-shall-not-be-named, so be careful as it goes. I won't mention Carl S if you won't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TonyP Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 peanut or chocolate, which one is stronger? only one way to find out! FIGHT!!!! I won't mention Carl S if you won't. please don't. If you ignore him he might go away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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