Tom S Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 "Watch out, silent but violent " 'That sounded wet' 'Did you follow through?' or just, raise your hand in the air and say That's me !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz6002 Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Funny you should ask that as I work in the "pump" industry..... Oooh is it interesting? Sounds like a load of hot air. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted June 26, 2008 Author Share Posted June 26, 2008 or just, raise your hand in the air and say That's me !! I would rether deflect the embarrassment by making a crude comment.... Honesty is not always the best policy especially if the smell hasn't arrived at that point...... H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Animal Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Funny you should ask that as I work in the "pump" industry..... I was going to mention that fact, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom S Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 I would rether deflect the embarrassment by making a crude comment.... Honesty is not always the best policy especially if the smell hasn't arrived at that point...... H. Ownership of a good one is good though !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted June 26, 2008 Author Share Posted June 26, 2008 Ownership of a good one is good though !! True...lol.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Golddigga Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Look for the nearest fat bloke and just stand there shaking your head in disgust Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muffleman Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 'I'm baking air biscuits, get 'em while they're hot' is a good one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spidermonkey Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 'I'm baking air biscuits, get 'em while they're hot' is a good one if you manage to fill the whole room it is known as an "air buffet", another slice sir:p Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tbourner Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 "And that was a short excerpt from the 9.8 second run" I've done a few 'short excerpts' from Harleys driving past as well, they're usually the one's when you feel you may need to check for kids that have inadvertantly been dropped off before you got to the pool!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Why T Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 One for the Squaddies. " e Springs" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keancy Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Sometimes you just can't help it though. Well he literally let it go seconds after walking into my office. I would have had the decency to walk out and do that in my own office. Must be a man thing as said previously. No manners. I love catching farts in my hands and realising them into peoples faces. Last week I managed to launch one down a 36" cardboard tube. I then used the tube like a giant blowpipe skilfully aiming it into a colleagues face with surprising accuracy That is totally Disgusting Dude and I would be very unimpressed if you did that to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 That is totally Disgusting Dude and I would be very unimpressed if you did that to me. Just sent you one in the post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newbiematt Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 A bloke at work always used to "ooh, that's a bit muddy!" when it was unpleasantly odoured. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedM Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 You guys! I'm in tears here. The office must think I've lost it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 "keep shouting sir we'll find you" have always made me chuckle Haha! OMG that's hillarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ellis Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 I've got a client who comes over and, whilst we're working, we have matches: 1 goal for a belch, 2 for a good quack! 'Squeakers' count as 1 goal whereas a good prolonged wet trouser checker count as Golden Goals and win outright! Cries of 2 - 1 are usually met with everyone diving for the door and air! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spidermonkey Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 I've got a client who comes over and, whilst we're working, we have matches: 1 goal for a belch, 2 for a good quack! 'Squeakers' count as 1 goal whereas a good prolonged wet trouser checker count as Golden Goals and win outright! Cries of 2 - 1 are usually met with everyone diving for the door and air! fart football - brilliant Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitesupraboy2 Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 the best to do is this; You're in bed with the missus you raise your legs slightly.....there it is...the air pocket. You know you're going to fill it, the missus might have an idea but you wait till you're ready. You pray for silence or a loud noise from the TV...you squeeze one out. You know its violent, you know its gonna smell like dog crap, what do you do, its down there circling in the pocket waiting to be released. So you look at the missus, you lean over to give her a cuddlelift the top of the cover to put it over her more....lift your foot and drop it. The stream of pongy air shoots up the bed into her face as the pocket has been open. DIRECT HIT!!! So ive heard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UltraFlynn Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 "Taxi!" Don't know why. Just has always amused me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted June 26, 2008 Author Share Posted June 26, 2008 You guys! I'm in tears here. The office must think I've lost it. It's a great subject. Another one I remembered was "A great theory Holmes....!! H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DevilsAdvocate Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 I Phart with impunity, if kaz complains I just take a pair of her socks out of the drawer (and that's post washing) Roy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bignum Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 "Twist it", don`t know why. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannoSupra Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 'didn't know there was a duck behibnd me' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyB Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 I usually just look to the sky and say "did you see that?!" with a confused look on my face Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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