carl0s Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 it's not as if you get taught how to wipe your ass at school ha ha ha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lewis Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 was a stander then converted to being a sitter albeit leaning to one side. I think it's a valid question tho, it's not as if you get taught how to wipe your ass at school "and everyone SIT and pull and move plums and wipe 2, 3, 4, fold 2, 3, 4, wipe 2, 3, 4............" I thought I learnt a lot at school, SOOOOO glad that wasn't on the curriculum though! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cable Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 "and everyone SIT and pull and move plums and wipe 2, 3, 4, fold 2, 3, 4, wipe 2, 3, 4............" lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobSheffield Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 This thread is great!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lewis Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 "NO! FFS Johnny, I said wipe BACKWARDS, now you have shit all over your balls!!, no playtime for you" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 this gets better. News flash men are incapable of even wiping their own a*ses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carl0s Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 this gets better. News flash men are incapable of even wiping their own a*ses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lewis Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 this gets better. News flash men are incapable of even wiping their own a*ses. Women don't shit from their arse do they? It's just a constant verbal stream..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cable Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 Women don't shit from their arse do they? It's just a constant verbal stream..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul ashton Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 1st time i've looked at this thread today,thought is was bad last night but seems to be getting worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 Women don't shit from their arse do they? It's just a constant verbal stream..... Sorry I don't discuss my toilet habits. I'm a lady. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul ashton Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 Sorry I don't discuss my toilet habits. I'm a lady. 'You know' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 "NO! FFS Johnny, I said wipe BACKWARDS, now you have shit all over your balls!!, no playtime for you" :rlol: :rlol: Nice one Lewis! This really is a 'no-holes-barred' forum! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 Lets talk about different poo`s 1st the ghost poo.. you wipe and there is no trace 2nd the cheese grater.. When the poo gets split by a hair:rolleyes: 3rd the deapth charger.. when poo drops in and there is a delay in splash back. 4th the neverending poo. No matter how much you wipe it will never go away Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 Warning: Please dry wipe at least once after having a bowel movement and before using the bidet. Excess fecal matter may clog the bidet drain. This can be quite disgusting for someone who uses the bidet after you. This thread has really mad me laugh. I always wanted to ask "how do I use a bidet?" especially if your washing your hair Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havard Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 Lets talk about different poo`s 1st the ghost poo.. you wipe and there is no trace 2nd the cheese grater.. When the poo gets split by a hair:rolleyes: 3rd the deapth charger.. when poo drops in and there is a delay in splash back. 4th the neverending poo. No matter how much you wipe it will never go away You have forgotten the "Chocolate Fountain". An spectacular anal upside down firework detonated in the lavatory bowl to celebrate a belly full of beer and a dodgy curry the night before!! H. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lewis Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 You have forgotten the "Chocolate Fountain". An spectacular anal upside down firework detonated in the lavatory bowl to celebrate a belly full of beer and a dodgy curry the night before!! H. Cue Michael with his hotlink image Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cable Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 Lets talk about different poo`s 1st the ghost poo.. you wipe and there is no trace 2nd the cheese grater.. When the poo gets split by a hair:rolleyes: 3rd the deapth charger.. when poo drops in and there is a delay in splash back. 4th the neverending poo. No matter how much you wipe it will never go away you cant forget 'El mooky Diablo' the devils poo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedM Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 it's not as if you get taught how to wipe your ass at school Next time someone at work says "do you want me to wipe you arse for you too?" I think I know how I'm going to reply. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hiten55 Posted February 8, 2007 Share Posted February 8, 2007 you may want to check this out. Dont ask how, stumbled across it a year or so ago - made me piss myself... not literally. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chewie Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 All this crap reminds me of a really shitty job I had working in this scummy restaurant. One of my duties was to clean the filthy bogs, polish the sink, taps, make sure everything was nice and fresh for the next guy to come in and vomit all over. One Sunday morning go off to do the bogs. I step into the Mens. Remember those old wall mounted roller hand towel machines? Grab the loop of towel hanging at the bottom and pull down for a bit of fresh. Well some disgusting arsehole and must’ve thought it was a wall mounted bum wiper. They’d yanked it apart, dragged about 20 feet of towel and painted a brown stripe along the entire length with a humungus log at one end. That starched cloth isn’t exactly poopshute soft and sphincter friendly. Must’ve wreaked havoc on his man hole. Best bit was there was loads of bog roll next to the shitter. After I cleared the mess I went to hand dry some dishes and prepare some salad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul ashton Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 you may want to check this out. Dont ask how, stumbled across it a year or so ago - made me piss myself... not literally. That's funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayman Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 All this crap reminds me of a really shitty job I had working in this scummy restaurant. One of my duties was to clean the filthy bogs, polish the sink, taps, make sure everything was nice and fresh for the next guy to come in and vomit all over. One Sunday morning go off to do the bogs. I step into the Mens. Remember those old wall mounted roller hand towel machines? Grab the loop of towel hanging at the bottom and pull down for a bit of fresh. Well some disgusting arsehole and must’ve thought it was a wall mounted bum wiper. They’d yanked it apart, dragged about 20 feet of towel and painted a brown stripe along the entire length with a humungus log at one end. That starched cloth isn’t exactly poopshute soft and sphincter friendly. Must’ve wreaked havoc on his man hole. Best bit was there was loads of bog roll next to the shitter. After I cleared the mess I went to hand dry some dishes and prepare some salad. PMSL!!!!!!!! This is a bad thread!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jspec Germany Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 :rlol: OMG.... the tears are streamin.... this thread is the best I've read in a long time. You know in Japan, you don't have to do anything. Just look over and press one of 10 buttons, then adjust the heater knob while your korn-hole gets the drive through car wash treatment. You still gotta' give it the old pat-pat when it's done though. I'm a firm believer in the moist wet-naps though. Cheap @$$ military paper here in NATO is like John Wayne. Rough and tough and don't take $h!t off nobody. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SupraStar 3000 Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 I bet you've had some moments flying long missions with NATO Mike. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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