ry4n Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 Just came across this and it made me chuckle. Dear Connie, I know the counselor said we shouldn't contact each other during our "cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore. The day you left, I swore I'd never talk to you again but that was just the wounded little boy in me talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first on to make contact. In my fantasies, it was always you who would come crawling back to me. I guess my pride needed that. But now I see that my pride’s cost me a lot of things. I'm tired of pretending I don't miss you. I don't care about looking bad anymore. I don't care who makes the first move as long as one of us does. Maybe it's time we let our hearts speak as loudly as our hurt. This is what my heart says "There's no one like you, Connie. I look for you in the eyes and breasts of every woman I see, but they're not you. They're not even close." Two weeks ago I met this girl at Flamingoes and brought her home with me. I don't say this to hurt you, but just to illustrate the depth of my desperation. She was young, maybe 19 with one of those perfect bodies that only youth and maybe a childhood spent ice skating can give you. I mean, just a perfect body. Tits like you wouldn't believe and ass that just wouldn't quite. Every man's dream, right? As I sat on the couch being blown by this stunner, I thought, look at the stuff we've made important in our lives. It's all so superficial. What does a perfect body mean? Does it make her better in bed? Well, in this case, yes, but you see what I'm getting at. Does it make her a better person? Does she have a better heart than my modestly attractive Connie? I doubt it. And I'd never really thought of that before. I don't know, maybe I'm just growing up a little. Later, after I'd tossed her about a half a pint of throat yogurt, I found myself thinking, "Why do I feel so drained and empty?" It wasn't just her flawless technique or her suttee shameless hunger; but something also, some nagging feeling of loss. Why did it feel incomplete? And then it hit me. It didn't feel the same because you weren't there to watch. Do you know what I mean? Nothing feels the same without you. Jesus, Connie, I'm just going crazy without you. And everything I do just reminds me of you. Do you remember Carol that singe mom we met at the Holiday Inn lounge last year? Well, she dropped by last week with a pan of lasagna. She said she figured I wasn't eating right without a woman around. I didn't know what she meant till later; but that's no the real story. Anyway, we had a few glasses of wine and the next thing you know we're banging away in our old bedroom. And this tart's a total monster in the sack. She's giving me everything, you know, like a real woman does when she's not hung up about her weight or her career and whether the kids can here us. And all of the sudden, she sports that tilting mirror on your grandmother's old vanity. So she puts it on the floor and we straddle it, right, so we can watch ourselves and it's totally hot, but it makes e sad too because I can't help thinking "Why didn't Connie ever put the mirror on the floor? We've had this old vanity for what, 14 years and we never used it as a sex toy." Saturday your sister drops by with my copy of the restraining order. I mean, Vickie’s just a kid and all, but she's got a pretty good head on her shoulders and she’s been a real friend to me during this painful time. She's given me lots of good advice about you and about women in general. She's pulling for us to get back together. Connie, she really is. So we're doing Jell-O shots in a hot bath and taking about happier times. Here's this teenage girl with the same DNA as you and all I can do is think of how much she looks like you when you were 18. And that just about makes me cry. And then it turns out Vicky's really into the whole oral thing, and that gets me to thinking about how many times I pressured you about trying it and how that probably fueled some of the bitterness between us. But do you see how even then, when I'm thrusting inside your baby sister's cinnamon ring all I can do is think of you? It's true Connie. In your heart you must know it. Don't you think we could start over? Just wipe out all the grievances away and start fresh? I think we can. If you feel the same please please please, let me know. Otherwise, can you let me know where the ****ing remote is? Love Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=32836&highlight=Dear Connie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marc_p Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 Brilliant!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marc_p Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=32836&highlight=Dear Connie c'mon that was three years ago lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ry4n Posted January 31, 2008 Author Share Posted January 31, 2008 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=32836&highlight=Dear Connie Bugger! Having said that 2005 was well before my time on these boards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian R Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 c'mon that was three years ago lol Still a repost and Bill Prawn seldom ever reposted. His jokes were better than current ones as well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian R Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 oh and for good measure http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=95584&highlight=divorce+letter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marc_p Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 oh and for good measure http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=95584&highlight=divorce+letter ok fair enough Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neil tt Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 Thats very good:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 still funny though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamesmark Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 I used to work for Tesco's few years ago, and it is very much true. Heinz made the beans, the tomato ketchup. HP made the brown sauce. All of Tesco's brand names are made by major companies, just different recipes. Tesco's value stuff because of this are sold at a loss. There is one big company that does not make products for anyone else and that is Kellogs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R Black Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 Class Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hoff Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 Very good indeed. I maycopy it for future refferance:d Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyB Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 I used to work for Tesco's few years ago, and it is very much true. Heinz made the beans, the tomato ketchup. HP made the brown sauce. All of Tesco's brand names are made by major companies, just different recipes. Tesco's value stuff because of this are sold at a loss. There is one big company that does not make products for anyone else and that is Kellogs wrong thread buddy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supra61 Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 Very good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian R Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 I used to work for Tesco's few years ago, and it is very much true. Heinz made the beans, the tomato ketchup. HP made the brown sauce. All of Tesco's brand names are made by major companies, just different recipes. Tesco's value stuff because of this are sold at a loss. There is one big company that does not make products for anyone else and that is Kellogs Nope Kellogs do now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian R Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 oh and me thinks you posted in the wrong thread Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrRalphMan Posted January 31, 2008 Share Posted January 31, 2008 I used to work for Tesco's few years ago, and it is very much true. Heinz made the beans, the tomato ketchup. HP made the brown sauce. All of Tesco's brand names are made by major companies, just different recipes. Tesco's value stuff because of this are sold at a loss. There is one big company that does not make products for anyone else and that is Kellogs Candidate for the most random change of topic ever? PS... too late, had it ready for ages, but had to do some work again...DOH! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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