Bill Prawn

Next time a woman asks for sex, try to oblige or you might end up like the guy in this story. Ouch

Celery, Celery, if she don't come We'll tickle her bum with a bunch of celery.

British Indoor 4x4 show is a Donny on the 13th Feb.

Spin that car

Better at posting jokes tham piccies eh Kev

I would make everybody, (including myself) re-take a test every 3 years. Driving is a privilege not a right. If this happened the standard of driving would improve, thus lowering the accident rate and poor driver manners that are growing all the time. (Of which we are all guilty).

A man enters his favourite ritzy restaurant and while sitting at his regular table, he notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a nearby table all alone. He calls the waiter over and asks for their most expensive bottle of Merlot to be sent over to her knowing that, if she accepts it, she is his. The waiter gets the bottle and quickly sends it over to the woman, saying this is from the gentleman over there. She looks at the wine and sends a note over to the man. The note reads: "For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million pounds in the bank, and seven inches in your pants." The man, after reading her note, chuckles, and sends a note of his own back to her, and it read: "Just so you know, I happen to have a Ferrari Testarosa, a BMW 850iL and a Silver Renault Scenic in my garage, and I have over twenty-five million pounds in the bank. But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you, would I cut three inches off. JUST SEND THE BOTTLE BACK..."

http://www.teleemg.com/casa/needle/supra.jpg I hope not.

Did anyone buy any of these? If so are there any piccies?

Or try this

What about Cornwall? There is a Supra.net member with a hotel in Newquay.

Worth a giggle some are old, some new, hope you all enjoy 1. What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife? 45 lbs. 2. What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? 45 mins. 3. What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman? Sexual harassment. 4. What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man? £3.99 a minute. 5. How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up. 6. How can you tell if your husband is dead? The sex is the same, but you get the remote control. 7. What's a blonde's favourite nursery rhyme? Humpme Dumpme. 8. What's it called when a woman is paralysed from the waist down? Marriage. 9. How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just sit there in the dark and complain. 10. What's the fastest way to a man's heart? Through his chest with a sharp knife. 11. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring and good looking? Because those men already have boyfriends. 12. What is a man's view of safe sex? A padded headboard. 13. How do men sort their laundry? Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable" 14. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you. 15. What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. 16. What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever. 17. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The guy who can have a cup of coffee in each hand and still carry a dozen donuts. 18. Who is the most popular woman at the nudist colony? The woman who ate the last donut. 19. What is the difference between a battery and a man? A battery has a positive side. 20. Do you know why they call it the Wonder Bra? When you take it off, you wonder where the breasts went. 21. Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law. 22. How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be open by the time she brings it. 23. Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. 24. Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. 25. How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven. 26. If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, whom do you let in first? The dog of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. 27. What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig? A woman that won't do what she's told. 28. I married Miss Right, I just didn't know her first name was Always. 29. I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her. 30. What do you call a man who has lost 95% of his intelligence? Divorced. 31. Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It is called Wedding Cake. 32. Marriage is a 3-ring circus: Engagement Ring Wedding Ring, Suffering. 33. Our last fight was my fault. My wife asked me "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!" 34. In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested. 35. A beggar walked up to a well-dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and said, "I haven't eaten anything in four days." She looked at him and said, "God, I wish I had your willpower." 36. Young Son: "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad: "That happens in every country, son

Whether you were or not. I'm the first to hold my hands up if i'm wrong

The letter was written after the first war and you are correct it was known as the Great War (although what is great about war?). I think in the quote it was put into context as the First war so many would understand what was being discussed. It was also to be the war that ended all wars........ how wrong was that then?

Oh and to add another it was requested by the EU that all member states observe three minutes for the Madrid train bombing. As from my understanding now, that is who requested the three minutes this week.

To further dampen my arguement the three minutes originally comes from a three minute pause observed at noon on every day in the first world war, this was when all work, all talk and all movement were suspended for three minutes that we might concentrate as one in thinking of those - the living and the dead - who had pledged and given themselves for all that we believe in. So that is possibly the answer you are looking for.

To shoot me down and others. I think if you look back you will see that 9-11 also had three minutes.

I think Jake's main gripe is with the length of time. Originally the first silence was two minutes but this has been diluted to one Now it suddenly goes up to three, why and who says so? I am not against the silence just the sudden size of it. The African plight in 1984 which spawned Live Aid say many more people lose their life yet they never had three minutes or more silence. On a different issue, but still linked.The Band Aid charity record in 1984 sold over 40 million copies (original version worldwide) so if this disaster in Asia is now a greater tragedy how many copies will the Robin Gibb one for the Tsunami victims sell if we work on the extended silence theory? This is not to berate posters or cause offence because I genuinely feel for the innocents involved.

LOL only in my spare time I have been appointed Press Officer for the Suzuki MotoGP Team. 17 events worldwide inc; Japan, USA, Australia, Brazil and China.

Funny that, when I tell everybody what the job is they all want to come and work with me

Ben I have got a new job which has worldwide travel. Plus phoning individuals worldwide daily. This and the clock have both already come in very handy

E-bay.

I agree with Jake. It seems that a minute or more's silence is given to everything now. When and where does it stop? I whole heartedly agree with the silence on Nov 11th, but to keep commemerating/celebrating tragic events is a bit grotesque. My heart goes out to these people as has some money to assist but I am not sure that a man in Indonesia would give three minutes silence for a tragedy in Europe. Waits for a barrage of abuse.

Went round the Wilson Wildlife Park last week. WOW what a treat Wallabies, Emu's, Peacocks, five HUGE dogs and more. Plus refreshments are great coffee and cookies Oh and I got the car done by a guy who tells it like it is Knocks spots off the local Toyota dealers car park anyday

Fresh hot water. Heating is all ok