Max5437

In Hadleigh near Southend and I can't find anything around at all, tried in the summer and got nothing back and handed out cv's to every place I could think off and I can't sell the supra as its my mums and she just wanted a reason to keep it and I gave her the reason that we would share it and split the bills so that's not an option, all the money I had went on the waste of a relationship and what was left has gone on my gt4 which I owe my parents money for until I sell my old car but even that won't cover the cost. I have run a Buisness before this time last year I ran a gym for 4 months when the owner was indulging himself on drugs. I wouldn't know what Buisness to try and start tbh, done a few detailing jobs for members of the bar I'm at one night s week but nothing to call an income. Hoping something towards marketing as have really enjoyed studying it and it encompasses some basic economics which was my favourite subject I have studied previously

I'm doing a business HND locally and finish that in May, then will hopefully be going to university of Essex for my final year unless I can find a job with just the HND which i know is unlikely

I hope it just comes to that but as Marc said I'm just a number and no matter how perfect my record is this is going to reflect badly, the manager said me going in to apologise will have helped my case but it's under investigation currently so guess I find out on Saturday. I'm not being big headed but I do try my absolute best to do anything for anyone and it is constantly biting me on the ass, if I can do anything for even a stranger I try and do so and yet still all I got from her was abuse. She will be ignored and now that I can't do anything other than hate her I do feel better oddly enough, thankfully everyone except management has put forward nothing but nice things for me so fingers crossed it's taken on board for what it was, her bullying me and deliberately causing problems at work, she could have waited in the car and nothing would have happened and she knew that

It's finding another job that's the issue at the moment, I have been looking but no one local is hiring and that's what worries me, I am just a number to them and it's only the fact she has been banned before I'm hoping I get some leniency and she was openly abusive to the store manager too, she was a Vile piece of work when she was fired bit again like you say I'm just a number to them. It's definitely been a learning curve the past few months and there's no worry about her contacting me, as soon as I heard her voice it would be hung up and blocked.

Thank you, it's difficult because I feel like I could do with talking to someone but just don't know where to begin, I really appreciate everyone who offered to lend an ear, I just haven't got a clue where to start, tbh I'm not used to having people who are happy to listen to my ranting and help out

Cheers lol I know I have fell into the stupid trap of still trying to care for someone who is essentially a flawed human being, she honestly needs to be sectioned and that's part the reason her parents weren't told anything, mental illness I found out recently runs in her family so she knew they would get her sectioned if she told them the truth, sad really but oh well if she's going to act like that then she gets what she deserved. Well while me and her were still dating I was diagnosed with minor depression and still have the information from that and have spoke to my parents about it and if I still feel like this over the next week or 2 have promised to contact one of the therapy things. Have a free one at a college which might be an idea to follow up on. Actually I'll contact the college one now, think it's a good option, thank you

You are completely right and I see it now and as soon as I calmed down. I just snapped completely, not proud of it, tried to be nice and it's destroyed my life, I regret the day I met her, being nice and giving her a lift home all those months ago was the single biggest mistake I have made. I have blocked all contact completely and am doing my best to forget about her. I'm done being nice or respectful. She's dead to me and that's how it should have been weeks ago. I really appreciate all the advice I got and have been taking it on board, thank you you are right, I'm have been a moron, she's blocked from any form of contact and everything I have that reminds me of her is getting chucked in the roof this afternoon. I reached my breaking point and now just need to focus on moving on with my life. She was nothing but a using psycho and I didn't know I could hate anyone this much. No vengeance no acknowledgement, if I can get her banned from coming in during my shifts then great, if not she's dead to me. I'm going to try and get a union rep ASAP but am not part of the Union but will join as I agree it will help. It's easier now I just despise the thought of her, just wish risking my job wasn't the price I had to pay to get over the bitch. Had a load of good advice and going to stick to it. Thanks just fingers crossed I can get away with it. It's mostly a blur what happened, just remember being so so angry and wanting to lash out for her hurting me again

Cheers guys, I have blocked her on everything and I honestly want nothing to do with the cow, she completely took advantage of me and I hate her for it. Well hopefully in my favour is I have a 100% clean work record, have come in often at 20 mins notice when shifts need to be convered and was even down to do 11pm till 5am on Black Friday as they couldn't get the staff. Also in my favour is they fired her for her conduct so they know about part of the situation already but am writing everything down and will present them with all the information, copies of the texts from her acknowledging that I wasn't coping and me telling her that it would push me over the edge and then she still did it. In all fairness I have done nothing wrong and In the past year to help out at Tesco I have done everything I possibly could so that might go in my favour. I just snapped and like I said that's only happened once before and that was after years and years of bullying which is effectively the same situation except it was more brutal bullying over a shorter period of time. I know I acted wrongly but it was deliberate on her part and she knows exactly how to push my buttons and always has and now it might have cost me my income

Well following on from this thread http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?328450-Are-relationships-worth-the-hassle in which i was amazed at the support i thought I could finally get on with my life after a horrible relationship and a viscous break up. Well i was wrong and she was determined to ruin my life just that little bit more by ringing me Tuesday morning of a unknown number so i could "hear it from her" that she has been seeing someone and how happy he was making her. so basically she rung me to rub my face in the fact she was with someone new but i did my best to be civil and told her i wished her all the best but could she just not rub my face in it anymore and could they refrain from coming into my work (considering she knew where i worked as we met on our shifts together) and she initially said she wouldn't come in and that was the end of it. well a little bit later i received a call again and i heard her out as she insisted she wanted to give us both closure, she told me how she didn't mean to hurt me and i had a go at her telling her what a sadistic bitch she was and then she said she can go into my work (Tesco) whenever she likes with whoever she likes. so me trying to be an adult said i was fed up of this shit and would prefer to see her in person and deal with this finally once and for all. she got nasty and told me how i wasn't worth a minute of her time let alone and to fuck myself and she hated me and was going to make my life hell. well i called her back, calmed her down and said i was happy she had someone who finally made her as happy as i had always tried to make her and she said thanks, i told her that i wasn't dealing with it too well and i just couldn't cope with her rubbing my face in it while i was working little side note- Yes it was my decision for us to split up but at the same time it was a decision i have struggled with and still am struggling with as I am a very withdrawn person and she is literally the only person i have ever been close too, she knew everything about me and we had so many things planned. i have accepted i have severe attachment issues and this is something i am trying to work on but cant see it changing any time soon, i keep everything i possibly can, every toy from childhood ect.. everything. plus have a horrifically good memory which has been such a curse! well no prizes for guessing what happened. she came into my work with her new boyfriend and i snapped, I haven't been coping with my messed up head replaying everything and of course everything at work reminded me of her anyways, her favorite foods, things i knew she would like, just everything in that place was making this harder. She came up to me while i was collecting baskets and i just screamed at her about how she could be so disrespectful and horrible, i cant even remember what i said its all just a blur but i remember calling her every name under the sun and then of course the new boyfriend started to square uo to me, security stepped in the middle and sent them down the other end of the store and i got on with my job, shaking with rage but did get back to work, while she was screaming in tears down the other end of the store. well i called her over and told her unless she left me alone i would tell the new guy everything, her drug history, her being responsible for him being put in hospital as she used him to make an ex jealous. and she screamed out saying i was pathetic making threats i could never follow through on. at this point her new boyfriend got right in my face and had the head of security holding us apart as i snapped and would have beaten the crap out of him given the chance for the disrespect. I put in months of hard work, took abuse and did everything to help this girl sort her life out and now she was better he was getting this girl with 1% of the problems, to put it bluntly fuck him! following this screamed more profanities and then security escorted them out the store and refused them entry again! well of course this has put my job in a perilous position and I'm not sure what i can possibly do? i went in yesterday, apologised to management and to those involved and tried to explain what happened, but Tesco refuse to listen till they review the footage in which i look awful as it will not show what she said to me and i reacted in a provocative physical manner. That is honestly the second time in my entire life that i have lost my temper but i just snapped. on a side note i messaged the new boyfriends sister who also works at Tesco telling her exactly what her brother was getting himself in for and all she said was its done the opposite because the brother now thinks he is going to "save" her from this life and the girl her is dating is now perfect - well he has a point, after me spending all this time trying to help her out she is no were near as damaged as she was when we first got together. also messaged her parents so they were aware of her addictions and passed on my concerns but did both these messages in such a nice manner that it was clear i thought that i was just trying to look out for both the new boyfriend (who i don't have a problem with) and for her in the message to her parents. well in summary I might have lost my job and for some absolutely ridiculous reason I still miss all the good times and all the relationship things, having someone want to talk to me, going to bed next to someone, waking up and seeing her smile to see me laying next to her. 99% of the relationship was awful but i cant help but focus on the 1% anyways if someone has any ideas about how to save my job it would be greatly appreciated. everyone i spoke to in Tesco apart from the manager said how she should be banned from the store and security have agreed that if she was to come in again and kick off then she would be banned which i will push for on grounds of harassment but at this point i'm more worried ill be jobless. Max

Not to insult but would you consider £200 delivered for the boost controller?

The cars on the supra stand were in far to superior condition to a lot of the cars at the show and were a credit to the club

I think im going to have to do that because after her turning up and telling her how she'd do anything for me back has made this so much harder. need to focus on the bad times and the reasons as to why i left in the first place. hopefully less horrific from now on as she keeps playing games with me and its torturing us both, i like the thought that this is just progress towards the right girl for me, thank you Ironically enough that is exactly what happened today, tried to stay strong with it all but she seems determined to prove that she can change and its awful to admit i wish she could although deep down I know she never will, that's all i ever wanted of her to be honest, to be concidered and put first for a change, to be treated the way i treated her and that just never happened. yes thank god it wasnt to that degree of i dread to think of how the situation could have been. thank you - - - Updated - - - Thank you, wasnt expecting this many responses but its very reassuring to not feel so alone in dealing with it. I have the feeling that K will be more persistent as she knows where i live, where i work, my shifts and where i am at set times during the day so fear this is far from over and its just making us both suffer more, but like you said getting out now is for the best and although it might get drawn out its the right choice. Cheers mate, appreciate your input, who knows what the future will bring, thanks

Cheers, think your right about it falling in your lap when you least expect it as that was the case for sure this time and yeah some serious self development is going to be needed, thank you Cheers mate, much appreciated and your right, in just 10 months i was worn down an incredible amount, i dont think i could have coped with it going on for much longer, going to take Al's advice and try some new things and hopefully that will help. thanks Thank you, Ironically enough she turned up at college and said how she was really miserable and how she just put it up in the hopes of hurting me like i apparently hurt her by leaving and how she would do anything to get me back, shutting her down is hard as there is still a large part of me that cares but i know that its not in my best interest and that she has lied so many times about it being different i don't even believe her anymore. your right about the whole pregnancy thing, she couldnt have coped and no doubt that situation could have been a living hell of comprehensible magnitude. cheers 0 Cheers mate, nice to hear a few happy stories and your right i'm sure in time it will improve, i sound like your mate did with all my mates saying it wasn't normal but me not knowing any better just took it as them being in a different situation and not understanding, more fool me. just going to give it time and hope the right girl comes along eventually, thank you Wow that was quite a read and have an awful lot of respect for you from going from that to where you are now, its worrying as i could have seen this relationship going that very route, its terrifying frankly and I'm really pleased for you that you have found the right girl now and have things sorted out. makes me feel a little silly about how i feel as it is nothing compared. thanks like with Al really appreciate your offer and will take you up on it as its great to know theres adults who can empathise and understand although at a significantly lower level than the two of you went through and are willing to give an ear to me, thank you. Thank you, wasn't expecting this magnitude of replies to be honest. I agree that walking away is the best option although it is also the hardest, those feeling for someone don't disappear overnight and her begging for me back tonight was a lot tougher than I thought it would be, its horrible to hear someone you care about sound that upset and frankly desperate and knowing its in my power to make her feel better made it all the harder but alas have stuck to my guns and held to the point that too much has happened for me and her to ever fix things and that we both need to accept the situation. people don't change even if they want too, and she will never be the sought to put me first and i need somone who cares in the same way i do/did about her. cheers will be sure to try and live a bit more than i used to that's for sure.

Cheers mate, yeah wont be checking again and just looking to move past her and the whole horrid situation

thanks, they all did for months and i was too stubborn to listen and I'm paying for it now, definitely going to focus on me from now on and not make the same mistakes again! Cheers That's awful, sorry it happened to you, and well i'm off to uni in September for my last year hopefully, cheers I'm not one to target really as I'm a bit of a recluse but planning on changing that now, cant let things get on top and the gym and cars help for sure along with all the replies this thread got, its nice to get input from people who are in no way involved and it has been a big help and really concreted what i need to do with this. thank you.

Fingers crossed, just gutted it ended like it has, but your right, onto bigger and better things thank you Thank you, i can see that now after stepping back from the situation, I did let myself be her doormat and getting together so quickly was a huge mistake as I dont think we would have got together if it hadn't been so intense and quick. I most certainly couldn't go back to her after what happened and wont make that mistake again with some selfish bitch who just uses people. couldnt agree more about letting someone else deal with her baggage and there was plenty of it ! there was no respect and feel like a mug for putting up with it tbh. never know might one day find a girl who bothers to make an effort for my interests, I bought a new car just before we broke up and she didn't so much as look at it when it was parked outside her door, saying thats money i could have used to take her on holiday the selfish bitch, no tits is worth that amount of crap! would love to have a gf that would at least fake interest. I suppose it means i know what to look for next time, i don't understand how you can give someone everything and they are never satisfied, i have certaily been put off looking for a relationship now, would rarther just focus on me. thank you learned they are snakes the hard way. single life is the way forward if you want to be happy it seems, plus more money for car parts.. lol Thank you, thought i had miss right now and that ended in fire haha fingers crossed thank you Thank you, fingers crossed, hopefully somone decent will fall into my life at some point but agree just focus on me now - - - Updated - - - Couldn't agree more about the first love statement, was a interesting experience to say the least and agree that it became a vicious cycle that brought us both down. I know what you mean but its hard to not hate her at the moment, gave her everything and got nothing to show except a load of crap feelings, loads of coursework and very few mates left. her depression and issues were there long before i was there and the most ironic reason that it all came out was because i apparently provided a stable enough environment to deal with her repressed issues. we never wanted the same things from the relationship although she claimed she wanted it to be long term but she was the type who would be happy living in a flat working a few days a week, half decent car and a few holidays a year compared to me who wants a nice house, nice cars, a life where i can do what i want when i want and I'm happy to work for that, but she never supported that dream and wanted me to stay working in tesco behind a till. thank you that does help Started on the gym again since this started to flake and it has been a massive help and back up to my normal weight now which is nice, will try and set some goals properly though, thanks issue with friends at the moment is they all work 5 days a week and i work weekends as I'm studying during the week but i should try and organise something, have zero plans for my 20th now which sucks! thank you

Couldn't agree more about social media being a curse yet its become such an integral part of society i can only see it getting worse. I had suspicions for the past month or so as she became very shielded and happier to answer her phone than be with me so wouldn't surprise me if there was someone else, towards the end she became so irrational and generally a mess that half the time she wasn't the person i knew and cared about, she became the kind of girl i wouldnt put it past tbh, thank you I felt obliged to help her, my conscience got me in a lot of trouble but i was just trying to do the right thing, life sure is, didn't see things going like this for certain, thank you That's a great way of looking at it, it has been a massive learning curve and my lack of knowledge with relationships sure shone through on a number of occasions, going back i would do a lot of things differently and who knows how things would have been different. That's an awful thing to walk in and experience, i don't understand what posses people to do such disrespectful things but i'm glad it has worked out for you in the end . i don't think i could ever be friends with someone after being that close to someone and i have definitely noticed that i have received the blame for everything that went wrong. Thank you she couldn't cook anyways hence she cost me so much and wouldn't let me cook either, thank you, your right I'm better of without her!

thank you, hopefully wont be to much crap to wade through before finding someone worth my time but for now i have changed a great deal although i am slightly concerned though that it is not all for the better, i care a lot less about people opinions or about people in generally after being with her, i have become lazy when it comes to helping people and i always doubt whether I'm moving in the right direction with a lot of aspects of life. i guess time will tell, thank you, will be sure to try and get out more, fear being home alone is only going to make this harder. Thank you, the depression was very hard to deal with to be honest and her taking it out on me brought out a lot of repressed issues i thought i had got past, i opened up completely to her so she knew exactly how to wear me down and the worst thing was that she did on an almost daily basis and that's another area to try and get passed, although my mum has always tried her best my dad was a bully due to pushing his insecurities on me and then i was bullied at school. my dad only stopped when i finally snapped, and i'm not proud of it but held a carving knife to his throat at 13 and that was what finally made him stop, for a few years then when it started again I had started on the gym and boxing so ended up dropping him again at 16 but since he leaves me alone but the home dynamic is very complicated and shattered with my mum not knowing 99% of this. Ill be sure to try doing something new when i can, its part of what i enjoyed with the relationship, the new experiences and there was a lot of them by the end. To be fair part of the reason i posted the above was hoping for some mature advice, none of my mates have ever been in the situation before and don't understand whats its like, they try but its not the same as from someone like yourself who has been through a significantly harder time and developed from it. she did have issued far predating the relationship, some was down to her dad as he did everything for her until her brother was born aged 6/7 and she never got over the transition of not getting all the attention, and the same happened when she was a teenager and that was repressed too until i provided a stable enough environment apparently for it to all come out and boy did it all come out. thank you for your offer, might take you up on it as my friends just don't really understand the psychology of it all. The happy memories just make this all the harder to deal with as i miss those times as they were perfect looking back on them through my rose tinted glasses. Cheers really appreciate all that and glad you recovered well mate First of all thank you for all the responses, was expecting this much but it has all helped I think its the deceit that hurts, I can accept that the relationship didn't work no matter how hard i tried but the back handed way shes dating someone new already, that's hard to deal with plus she was saying when we broke up how much she regretted that we were happier apart and all that utter crap. i can deal with something logical but being backhanded and deceitful is just a step further imo. thank you

Its so horrible to feel so used, she is already blocked on everything and again like a mug i only checked her twitter because i was concerned for her well being and it backfired severely, guess ill just have to get through the next few weeks, thank you btw

Thank you, i appreciate it, just feel so worthless now knowing i was so simple to replace

Bit of a random post but guess I'm hoping for some form of reassurance as there have always seemed to be a good community and a lot of people who bring partners to events ect and currently feel hopeless with the whole topic and being surrounded by people who say it doesn't matter, get over it and just find a new bird has made me feel 100% worse about the whole situation. well i guess it makes sense to sum up what I'm rambling about. to be fair even if no one bothers to read it will just be nice to get off my chest i guess lol missing out a lot but here goes To start of with i am pathetically shy and have never had a girlfriend previous to this and am/was pretty much a recluse, went out literally a few times a year socially and just went to work and the gym but i was happy with that, anyways met a girl at work here after referred to as"K" last November/December, got together on new years day (mistake no.1) and just fell madly in love with her as she was the opposite of me, didn't think about the future, spent her money of whatever she fancied, a complete free spirit and she made me live my life for the first time and that was great (mistake no.2). I gave her everything i possibly could, if she asked for it if i could possibly do it i would, her happiness literally meant the world to me. Then the problems started, she hated my best friend of 3 years and my family and after months of arguing my best friend went and i never heard a word from my friend again and my family disappeared too as they didn't know why she hated them (Mistake no.3) around the same time K was having trouble at work and was taking the stress out on me but i accepted that and supported her the best i could. I literally stayed at her house every night for the past 9 1/2 months as it made her happy to have me there (or so i thought) so i revolved my life around her, I almost ruined the first year of my degree because she always came first, i put up with psychological abuse every day for the past 6 months because all i wanted was to make K happy and was madly in love for the first time, every day she would accuse me of cheating, lying, hating her, conspiring against her, she blamed everything on me, she was diagnosed with depression so again i stayed with her to help her through it, i couldn't morally leave someone to deal with that alone and on top she blamed me for her being depressed so guilted me and i felt obligated to stay. After this happening for a few months I couldn't cope anymore and I left, and she cried, turned up at my house, turned up at my work (she was fired shortly after being diagnosed) but i kept away till i broke and gave her another chance using the two holidays we had taken as proof that we could be that happy together again (Mistake no.4) Now at this point i had just had a meeting about the second year of my degree and i was allowed back on the course but had to resubmit assignments from the previous year and I made sure that K was aware that college had to come first this year and she accepted that or so i thought. (also a irrelevant side note is she was on 3x my salary yet i had spent the best part of 5K half my student loan and all my wages on her yet she spent her money on only herself, i got a keyring when we went on holiday costing £1.50 yet i spent over £100 on her :/ ) K of course didn't like college coming first so tried to make me drop my degree to spend more time with her which i'm proud to say i didn't, as such the arguing and abuse got worse and worse till i didn't recognise myself in the mirror nor the girl i was spending all my free time with and i stopped spending a penny on her too. Then she told me that she would stay with me till i go to Uni in September (to do the last year of my degree) but dosent do distance. this pushed me to tell her that i couldn't stay with her then as despite everything I don't want a relationship with an expiry date and at this point i had grown a pair and started to put myself first a bit. the key problem was i still cared and loved her like a fool, she is literally the only girl who has shown any interest and has made me feel wanted (I have plenty of insecurities due to a childhood of being bullied which i think is why i stuck with her, she made me feel a way i never had, like i mattered) well this week everything was finalised, we both care about each other (allegedly) but we were happier now separated. well i could live with that as we both seemed to be in the same boat and sometimes you cant force things to work and im logical enough to accept that. but tonight i checked her twitter feed just to make sure she was okay (she is still dealing with depression and a new job) and see tweets saying "No one else has ever given me the same feeling you do, after all these years and you're still able to do it " "My relationship ended months ago, we just never accepted it until recently but we've both moved on & I wish him nothing but happiness" "Can't wait to see him tonight. Cuddle, film, pizza, perfect night! #excited" "So glad to finally be out of that dreadful relationship. Can start to build my confidence back up now " plus a few more but the gist is clear, safe to say I'm completely heartbroken, not even 24 hours after we finish properly and shes with someone new and its killed me inside and i feel like i'm going to snap and don't know whether to drive to hers and destroy everything she owns or to just give up on life completely hence me sitting here at 3am writing out this rant about how messed up this all is. the other hardest aspect is that she is the first person I did a lot of things with, first person i slept with, first holiday, first valentines, first road trip, first girl introduced to my parents and having to meet hers, just everything was with her and now i feel like because i chose myself and my future i have lost the person i invested everything i could with but also that i must have been worthless to her as i was replaced so easily. I have never felt so down about myself or had less self confidence and i'm sat here hoping someone will pop up and just tell me that it will all be worth it when the right person comes along, just hope someone who's gone through something similar can advise because all but 2 of my mates are useless and just making this harder to deal with. Sorry to put a dampener on anyone who reads this just didn't know where else i might get some helpful replies

I don't suppose your going to the NEC this Sunday?

Pretty certain when i changed mine it was a case of removing the dash panels, then reusing the stock supra cage with a din tray underneath, or as you are using a double din just put it in the stock supra cage. only other thing you need is the wiring adapter but those are available online or at halfords cheap enough. don't think there was anything else

Thank you, I like it too, the grill looks very empty without imo

Oh right, I bought my facelift rear lights from him lol cheers mate, fingers crossed for the weather now thank you